No need for cheese...

because there is no "whine" in the post.

Curt and I were talking about the ward and how hard it is to really put ourselves out there and get to know people.

We were talking about this and it suddenly occured to me that we are on the other end of the rainbow from where we were when Aaron was born. We have been here for 11years and living in a "transitional" ward is very challenging. For a person with older children and a 2 yr.old; being in a "newlywed, nearly dead, and bottle-fed" ward it's hard.

Here's the story ***bling*** I was pregnant with Aaron after SO long of trying to concieve. I was on the enrichment commitee, I did all the decorating, most of the cooking and always had a hand in the planning so that things went smoothly. and so the ladies in Relief Society knew who I was. I didn't have many friends even though we had lived there for 6 months. The bishop didn't even know our names even though we were active and went to every activity they had. Then, I had Aaron. I called my Visiting Teachers, the RS President and the bishop and our home teachers to tell them that Aaron had been born. We were so excited. We brought him home and 2 days later had to take him back for Jaundice. I was back a forth from the hospital (NICU) for 3 days. For mothers who've had to take their children back, you understand that this is hard, especially for first time moms. I had called the RS President to tell her that we would need help with dinners. I never got a call back... from anyone. I went to church with Aaron a week later and no one cared. A few WEEKS later, the RS President called to ask if they could come by to see me. They walked in, sat down and told me that they were just checking up on me to see if I needed anything. They were there for maybe 5 minutes and then had the audacity to tell me that they had to go take dinner to another lady in the ward who had just had a baby and came home from the hospital that day. They quickly got up and left. I was stunned.
I asked the RS compassionate service coordinator what happened, and she said she never even knew I had a baby. She also told me that probably the reason we didn't get help, was because we lived in apartments. She was my only friend in the ward and she told me that since we didn't live in a house, we would probably move in the next year and so they didn't want to invest the time and effort for making us feel welcome in the ward.

*** bling***

Curt and I have come to realize that one of the wonderful things, although frustrating, is that there are so many people coming and going in this ward, we try to make that investment. I have met some really great people who had been here for ONLY a year. We have made lasting friendships and even though they aren't here living by us, I remember things they've said to me. They have helped me through trials that they aren't even aware of.

I have come to realize that "cliques" happen. I have never liked them, but I think a lot of it is because I don't believe in just sticking to one friend. I have different friends for different areas of my life. I have never been one to stick in a group. I try to be friends with everyone and try to find those who sometimes get left behind. I hope that I have helped these people as much as they have helped me.
I have one wonderful gal that will call me when there is an awesome class at the gym and I feel really bad that I've been sick or the timing just hasn't worked out to go with her.
I have another friend that invited me to do things with her, but unfortunately it's on a day that I don't have the car. I just need to plan ahead, and she's spontaneous, which is one of the best things about her!
Also in the ward is someone that when I find out she's teaching Relief Society I try to come because she's one of the smartest people I know and I learn SO much from her. She's straightforward about her opinions, but lets her life be led by the Spirit.

As I looked around the ward, I realized that I do have "warm-fuzzies" for some of the women of the ward. I have these same feelings for many women who have already moved out of the ward. Others that I didn't see today, I was sad, I missed giving them a hug. (I hug them because I know we BOTH need it.) I have ward women that I really only get a chance to chat with on Facebook or through their blogs, but love them just the same. I do look for them in Sacrament meeting. I love their children whom I see in Primary.

As I listened to the talks today, I was knocked back a little as I realized a few things. Am I treating some of these people like they aren't worth the "year-long" investment? I sure hope not. Therefore, I am setting a goal to look for people I don't know and to try to get to know them, even if they are here for a little while.